I really wish I'd documented this a little better. The amount of hammering, torching and smashing fingers made it much more exciting than I initially thought it would be. Basically two wheel studs had been broken off on one of the rear tires. If they weren't right next to each other I probably would've waited to fix them but I'm glad I didn't.
When I finished I wanted to be sure I didn't screw up the rear brakes so I took it for a spin in the rain. This allowed me to look up the tires, drive a bit like a maniac and test the windshield wipers. Win! Win! Win!